“How do I find my life purpose?”
“How do I know and identify what I am here on this earth to do?”
This question seems to be coming up a lot of late.
I updated a Blog post recently where singer Lenny Kravitz shared that he had known from 5 years of age exactly what he wanted to do after seeing the Jackson 5 on TV. Lenny said he then found it strange when he would meet people who hadn’t found their sense of life purpose and direction and that he couldn’t understand what that must be like.
I also attended an event at the weekend with ex-NFL Football Player Trent Shelton. As people shared their experiences from the audience it was clear that many were ‘lost’ when it came to their life purpose, and that often times the world either didn’t make sense, or it was a frustrating place to be because they knew there was ‘something’ they were destined to do but had no idea what. Or, they knew what that ‘something’ might be yet for various reasons such as fear, uncertainty, insecurity, a sense of responsibility, or lack of self belief, they felt unable to pursue that purpose and dream.
“It took me 32 years to find my life purpose.”
As I shared with everyone at the event with Trent, it took me the first 32 years of my life to find my thing. Despite being one of the most qualified people in my graduating class, and I don’t say that to brag; I had a Business Degree, Post Graduate Diploma from the Chartered Institute of Marketing, a Teaching Certificate and a Business Administration Diploma, however I was so quiet and shy and low in self esteem that I lacked the confidence to apply for any graduate jobs and instead spent many years working as a secretary and administrator. There is nothing wrong with either of these jobs, it is just that I knew that I wanted to do something different and use my skills, if only I had the courage.
The seeds of how to start finding my life purpose had been planted many years before whilst I was at University. I had watched an episode of the Oprah Winfrey Show. It featured several Mompreneurs; mom’s who had built multimillion dollar businesses from their kitchen tables, and the conversation turned to how each of these women came up with the idea.
Oprah shared a gem about how you can identify your life purpose.
Photograph courtesy of Harpo Studios
She said (and I paraphase): “What is the conversation, such then when you hear it as you are passing by, it would cause you want to stop and join in?”
I had no idea what it meant at the time, however for some reason it stuck with me. There weren’t really coaches or therapists back then that I could sit and discuss such things with, so I heard it, it resonated, yet I had no idea what to do with it, so the question lay dormant in my mind for another 12 or so years.
Now of course, having found my calling I totally understand and get what it means. If I ever hear a conversation about the weight of emotional baggage that people are carrying around and whether it is possible to sort it out and remove it, or conversations about transformation, personal growth, or the empowerment of the spirit and soul, I would absolutely want to stop and join in.
So Tip 1 in finding your life purpose would be to sit with that question and really see what thoughts, ideas, or images come to mind as you ponder it.
Life Purpose Tip 2 – Identify the Love
Ask yourself what you would absolutely love to do in terms of contribution or work even if you weren’t being paid to do it. I have found that when people are living their passion and purpose, although they are generously compensated for that, and rightly so, they would also, and quite often do, give their skills, services, and expertise free of charge because they love doing it so much.
The fabulous illustration below is from SketchNote Artist Caroline Chapple, the Founder of Chapple Cartoons. I saw what Caroline called this ‘quick doodle’ (which she does daily on Facebook just for the love of it) and I asked if I could share it:
SketchNote by Caroline Chapple of Chapple Cartoons.co.uk
My Mentor often gently tells me off for the amount of time and free coaching advice that I offer to followers on my facebook page, however for me I love answering questions, sharing insights, and offering inspiring food for thought if I think it will help someone.
Life Purpose Tip 3 – Find Your Natural Talents
Identify what you do so naturally and easily and enjoyably that it almost doesn’t feel like there is any real ‘work’ or ‘effort’ involved. For example, for me this includes being able to look at seemingly confusing, perplexing, complicated or overwhelming situations and get to the heart of the issue, often within minutes. As Marie Diamond from the hit movie The Secret said to me: “Marilyn you are like the transformation juggernaut. You come in, see what needs to be done, whiz around at the speed of light, sort it all out, and then you are gone again. All the while the person is still looking at their pile of stuff wondering what happened or where to begin!”
I had no idea what a Management Consultant or Project Manager was growing up, however when I discovered the profession 10 years ago I was right at home and have been loving it ever since. In alignment with the sharing of thoughts and ideas, when I became a public speaker, corporate trainer, and personal development workshop facilitator, it was again like coming home, and for someone who used to be terrified of public speaking, I love and enjoy every single minute of being on stage, TV, and radio.
Life Purpose Tip 4 – Expand Your Thinking
Having asked yourself the question about what you love and where your natural and enjoyable skills and talents lie, you have to allow yourself to expand your thinking because it is easy for the: “Oh I would never be able to do that!” thoughts to kick in.
In PhotoReading™ terms we call this expanded awareness and the accelerated learning state. In Hawaiian Huna it is called Hakalau.
Allow yourself to hold that space, and entertain the idea and possibilities because when you are in a space and place of openness, you are much more likely to see and notice and be aware of the opportunities and synchronicities that present themselves. It also provides the space for clarity around your life purpose to evolve and grow.
I saw the following picture and quote in relation to the Limitless – Where Neuroscience Meets Science Fiction Event that I am running later on this year however I think it does the job here to:
Life Purpose Tip 5 – Be . . . .
Whether that is being courageous, being brave, being assertive, or being the person capable of stepping into or up to the opportunities that present themselves, you are probably going to have to do or be something that you haven’t previously been.
The more you step into being the more your life purpose can formalise and take shape.
For me, I remember it like it was yesterday, that day in 2004 as I rode up the glass elevator in the HM Treasury Department on Horse Guards Parade in London. The person I had come to see to discuss the design and delivery of a corporate training and coaching programme for his team of staff didn’t recognise me and proceeded to speak to every, shall we say, English women in reception. Just as he had given up, thinking that reception had called him down by mistake, I called his name. The look of shock on his face was like something out of movie. I was gutted, and it pulled the rug from right underneath me because it was my first ever lone assignment.
“Who was I to be coming in here telling this man how to run and develop and train his team?”
As the elevator rose, along with my level of panic, a voice inside of my head suddenly and firmly made a decision to be. To be the best Management Consultant and Corporate Trainer that I could be. I also made a decision to be more than a black woman in a suit. No, I was going to be the best Trainer and Consultant that he and my future clients had ever seen or worked with. As I stepped out of the lift I stepped into being that, and ironically, over the 10 years that I have now been a Management Consultant, Executive Coach, and Corporate Trainer, that is often the feedback that I get.
Life Purpose Tip 6 – Be Yourself
This should come naturally if you have followed the tips above however it doesn’t hurt to mention it outright. So what do I mean be yourself? For those who already are, this will seem like an odd concept because who else could you be?
I remember once finishing speaking at a big show at Kensington Olympia in London. Several people then queued up to purchase a copy of my book, and share the insights that they had gained from the talk. A number of them also remarked that I was: “Just like I was on stage.” When the first person said it I let it go however by the 7th or 8th time I realised that some people must have an ‘on stage’ persona and an ‘off stage’ persona.
For me, it would have been far too tiresome to run 2 personalities, so I just decided from the outset of my speaking career that it would be easier to just be myself because that means when you are doing the thing that you love, you are also in alignment and authentically you. From this space your purpose flows even more naturally.
Tip 7- Speak to Your Soul
All of the above tips should help you uncover what that thing is for you. If however having done all of that, you are still a little in the dark I would recommend some Soul Whispering. There are several ways that you can do this.
One is to sit quietly, almost in a meditative state, and ask your Soul what your purpose is and what you were born to do. I know however that some people say they have been asking, and searching, and pondering their entire lives and nada, nothing, zilch. If that is you, the more practical and sure fire way is to do a Soul Plan Reading.
My own Soul Plan Reading, which was done 14 years after I became a Coach, Therapist, Trainer. and Inspirational Speaker, revealed that my Soul Purpose and Destiny was to: ‘Gain as much knowledge as I can in this lifetime and then go out and share that knowledge with others through teaching, healing and being a channel for spiritual information.’
The Challenges however that would stand in my way included being in denial of spirituality, feeling insecure, lacking in self worth, having a fear of failure, and being unwilling or unable to express myself. Only when those things were overcome would I really start achieve my Worldly Goals, step into my Worldly Talents, and then progress to the more spiritual side of life.
(Did I mention that I was very quiet and shy and lacking in confidence and self esteem right up until the age of 32? Yes. Did I also mention that I was so in denial of anything spiritual or do with the healing arts that I was all set to become a Chartered Accountant?)
For me, and my clients, the Soul Plans are always absolutely spot on, very insightful, and most revealing. However, as I said, you can just sit with it, but for those who don’t want to wait 14 years, or 32 years, or their entire lifetime, the Soul Plan Reading is a way to get in touch with that in the space of just a few hours.
Phew. Don’t necessarily try and rush through these tips. Take the time to ponder and explore them. It may be that the answers come to you in an intuitive flash. For others it might take several days or even weeks of contemplation if you are doing it alone. Given that you still have your whole life ahead of you, afford yourself the time to nail it properly once and for all because it is definitely worth the wait and investment.
I hope you have found these tips and insights useful. Do feel free to leave a comment in the box below and share what you revealed and uncovered as you applied them.
If you know others who would benefit from reading this Blog, do also click the ‘Share’ buttons.
Until next time!
Marilyn Devonish
ABOUT MARILYN DEVONISH
Marilyn Devonish is a Freelance Magazine Writer, Creative Thought Leader, Keynote Speaker, and Workshop Facilitator.
She is a Certified Trainer of NLP, Hypnosis, and Time Line Therapy, a Certified PhotoReading Instructor, Angel Tarot Card Reader, a Certified Life and Executive Coach, and Soul Plan Reader. She is also a Practitioner in Hawaiian Huna, EFT, DNA Theta Healing, EmoTrance, Access Bars, Access Consciousness, Reiki, Archetypal Profiling, Past Life Regression, and Future Life Progression.
She has been in Therapeutic Practice since the year 2000, and has been a Management Consultant, Price2 Project Manager, and Corporate Trainer since 2004. She specialises in working with both individuals and corporations that want to accelerate their learning, make lasting change, and transform their thinking or processes for the better.
Website: www.tranceformationsTM.com
E-mail: marilyn@tranceformationsTM.com
Services Guide: www.tranceformationstm.com/servicesguide
For further information about booking a Soul Plan reading go to: www.tranceformationsTM.com/archetypal
To get a sense of what the Soul Plans are all about you can read the Soul Plan that Marilyn did for Whitney Houston. Click here.
That was very useful because of the simplicity of the approach….It made me hear a small voice inside that called me on my own limitation. ” I’m. Not good enough ” I’m not good enough to pass on my knowledge on the scale that Oprah or Iyanla do so I should stay back and just do what brings me the financial rewards without the risks…I will ponder these tips because it resonates with me that there are certain conversations that make me stop and want to join. Just this evening I was talking to my daughter about the experience of so many women. The experience of not allowing ourselves to have expectations in relationships because experience has taught so many of us that those expectations are not part of our experience so we settle with surviving with enough of ourselves to start over or at the very least carry on…As I said pondering.